"Here's to plain speaking and clear understanding..."
~ toast by Gutman (Sydney Greenstreet) to Spade (Humphrey Bogart) in The Maltese Falcon
Read on another blog somewhere...
A farmer was working in his field when a young boy came running.
“Papa, sister is in the hay loft with the hired man. She has her skirt up and he has his pants down. THEY ARE GOING TO PEE IN THE HAY!”
“Son, your observations may be accurate, but your conclusions are not.”
The global warming “scientists” are representative of the son – we are “sister”, and Al Gore is the hired man.
“Papa, sister is in the hay loft with the hired man. She has her skirt up and he has his pants down. THEY ARE GOING TO PEE IN THE HAY!”
“Son, your observations may be accurate, but your conclusions are not.”
The global warming “scientists” are representative of the son – we are “sister”, and Al Gore is the hired man.
food baggage...
“There are some people who eat an orange but don’t really eat it. They eat their sorrow, fear, anger, past, and future.”
- Thich Nhat Hanh
Starry NIght
“For my part I know nothing with any certainty, but the sight of the stars makes me dream.”
-Vincent van Gogh
Therapy by proxy...
Jonathan:
I have a chance to work with Jim Jarmish - my whole life could change!
Therapist:
Mmmm, sounds like an illusion to me. Lives don't change; we simply become more comfortable with our core misery...which is a form of happiness.
~ from HBO's Bored to Death
Patience is a Virtue...
A Tennessee State Trooper was patrolling late at night off the main highway.
He sees a couple in a car, with the interior light brightly glowing. He carefully approaches the car to get a closer look. Then he sees a young man behind the wheel, reading a computer magazine. He immediately notices a young woman in the rear seat, filing her fingernails.
Puzzled by this surprising situation, the trooper walks to the car and gently raps on the driver's window. The young man lowers his window.
Puzzled by this surprising situation, the trooper walks to the car and gently raps on the driver's window. The young man lowers his window.
'Uh, yes, Officer?'
The trooper asks: 'What are you doing?'
The young man says: 'Well, Officer, I'm reading a magazine....
Pointing towards the young woman in the back seat the trooper says: 'And her, what is she doing?'
The young man shrugs: 'Sir, I believe she's filing her fingernails.'
Now, the trooper is totally confused. A young couple, alone, in a car, at night in a lover's lane ... and nothing obscene is happening!
The trooper asks: 'What's your age, young man?'
The young man says: 'I'm 22, sir.'
The trooper asks: 'And her ... what's her age?'
The young man looks at his watch and replies: 'She'll be 18 in 11 minutes...'
The trooper asks: 'What are you doing?'
The young man says: 'Well, Officer, I'm reading a magazine....
Pointing towards the young woman in the back seat the trooper says: 'And her, what is she doing?'
The young man shrugs: 'Sir, I believe she's filing her fingernails.'
Now, the trooper is totally confused. A young couple, alone, in a car, at night in a lover's lane ... and nothing obscene is happening!
The trooper asks: 'What's your age, young man?'
The young man says: 'I'm 22, sir.'
The trooper asks: 'And her ... what's her age?'
The young man looks at his watch and replies: 'She'll be 18 in 11 minutes...'
Proportional Experiences
I read this about motorcycle riding and I liked the concept of "proportional experience". It can (I imagine) apply to flying...or playing in a band...or tennis...or a relationship...
"One of the cool things about riding is that it's a proportional experience. The more passion we put into it, the richer the reward. It's entirely our call; therefore, we all get exactly what we want."
Motivation
"Think of motivation and passion as going hand in hand.
If you lose passion for the things you feel are important, motivation never sticks around for very long.
Remind yourself everyday of the things that are important in your life."
~ Bob Greene
Apple stole my classic pickup lines!
"...some say I'm too fast"
"When you're ready to compromise, call me..."
From the latest 'Get a Mac' ad.
Ouch!
“If there is anything that we wish to change in the child, we should first examine it and see whether it is not something that could better be changed in ourselves.”
~ C.G. Jung
Immutable Law of Computing...
Fix a computer for a friend or family member and you'll be tech support for life.
A little too close to home...
Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha!
Ha! Ha! Ha!
Ha! Ha!
It's funny because he's fat!
Mr. Chow on The Hangover
Karma Compromisers
There are people in my life who I disagree with;
There are other people in my life who bug me;
And there are people in life who I think are Karma Compromisers - if you hang out with them you literally put yourself in harm's way as far as Karma, because they are that bad a person.
Dennis Miller, talking about Nancy Pelosi, on the O'Reilly Factor, August 12, 2009
Dumb like a fox...
The Barber and the Kid
A young boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his customer, "This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you."
The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, "Which do you want, son?" The boy takes the quarters and leaves.
"What did I tell you?" said the barber. "That kid never learns!"
Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream store. "Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?"
The boy licked his ice cream cone and replied, "Because the day I take the dollar, the game's over!"
Think about it...
Two parrots sat on a perch.
After a moment, one said to the other: "Do you smell fish?"
Don't mess with Cops
The recent Harvard Professor vs. Cambridge Policeman brouhaha sure has sparked debate.
I can see both sides.
I can see both sides.
As for my own potential behavior in that situation, I think the Neely Tucker sums it up best in the Washington Post: “One of the common-sense rules of life can be summed up this way: "Don’t Mess With Cops.”
"It doesn’t matter if you are right, wrong, at home or on the street, or if you are white, black, Hispanic, Jewish, Muslim or whatever. When an armed law enforcement officer tells you to cease and desist, the wise person (a) ceases and (b) desists.
The End."
Mmmm...makeup!
"Ok, girls, today's lesson is makeup.
First, we start with the eyes.
The eyes are the nipples of the face."
~ from The House Bunny
If only...
"Everything I do is more fun when you are doing it with me."
- Jordan to Perry (Dr. Cox) on Scrubs
Makes some things a bit clearer...
"Good people will do good things, and bad people will do bad things. But for good people to do bad things—that takes religion."
~ Steven Weinberg
To which Freeman Dyson adds:
"Weinberg's statement is true as far as it goes, but it is not the whole truth. To make it the whole truth, we must add an additional clause: 'And for bad people to do good things—that takes religion.'
" The main point of Christianity is that it is a religion for sinners. Jesus made that very clear. When the Pharisees asked his disciples, "Why eateth your Master with publicans and sinners?" he said, "I come to call not the righteous but sinners to repentance."
Only a small fraction of sinners repent and do good things, but only a small fraction of good people are led by their religion to do bad things.
~ Steven Weinberg
To which Freeman Dyson adds:
"Weinberg's statement is true as far as it goes, but it is not the whole truth. To make it the whole truth, we must add an additional clause: 'And for bad people to do good things—that takes religion.'
" The main point of Christianity is that it is a religion for sinners. Jesus made that very clear. When the Pharisees asked his disciples, "Why eateth your Master with publicans and sinners?" he said, "I come to call not the righteous but sinners to repentance."
Only a small fraction of sinners repent and do good things, but only a small fraction of good people are led by their religion to do bad things.
Ewwwww!
1st hiker: "Is that a Hobbit over there?"
2nd hiker: "No, it's a hobo and a rabbit, but they're making a hobbit."
The first rule of traveling...
If, in a given situation, you have a choice between having a good time and having your dignity and you can't have both...go for the good time.
Based on rigorous research...
From Simplemarriage.net:
To put this discussion into perspective, let’s review the characteristics of strong, stable, and satisfying marriages. While it is understood that there is not one way to have a stable and satisfying marriage, there are some common factors worth highlighting. Research states these characteristics as: investment in the well-being of the beloved; respect; admiration; sexual desire; intimacy; commitment; exclusivity; and understanding.
Oh, man...I'm hosed.
Found on my Mom's refrigerator...
The man who does not read good books has no advantage over those who can't read them.
Here is a fella with strong opinions...
"You can pretend Obama's massive spending spree didn't happen.
You can pretend Hillary Clinton didn't go to China to beg the Chinese to keep buying T-bills
You can pretend Geitner didn't recently go to China and drew loud laughter and scorn for suggesting Chinese assets are safe.
You can pretend all this massive spending that has taken place since TARP 1, which Senator Obama approved and voted for is all Bush's fault.
But all that is the stuff of unicorns and pixy dust. In this real world, Obama's massive spending is wrecking the US Economy."
You can pretend Hillary Clinton didn't go to China to beg the Chinese to keep buying T-bills
You can pretend Geitner didn't recently go to China and drew loud laughter and scorn for suggesting Chinese assets are safe.
You can pretend all this massive spending that has taken place since TARP 1, which Senator Obama approved and voted for is all Bush's fault.
But all that is the stuff of unicorns and pixy dust. In this real world, Obama's massive spending is wrecking the US Economy."
~ from a reader's comment to an article reporting that a Chinese Finance Minister want U.S. bonds to be issued in yuan instead of dollars.
The meditation phrase for today is...unicorns and pixie dust
A Concise Definition...
Sanctimonious - hypocritically pious or devout
The meditation word for today is...sanctimonious
The Dunning-Kruger Effect
The Dunning-Kruger effect - those who are least competent tend to have the most wildly inflated estimates of their own knowledge and competence.
They don’t know enough to know that they don’t know, as it were.
They don’t know enough to know that they don’t know, as it were.
It's not exactly Sun Tzu...but it works for me!
"In war - as in loving,
you've gotta keep on shoving.
Or you never will receive
your just reward."
~ General George S. Patton
My company got reorganized again today...
"We trained hard, but it seemed that every time we were beginning to form up into teams, we would be reorganized.
"I was to learn later in life that we tend to meet any new situation by reorganizing; and a wonderful method it can be for creating the illusion of progress while producing confusion, inefficiency, and demoralization."
~ Generally attributed to Gaius Petronius Arbiter, but more likely paraphrased from Charles Ogburn, pp. 32-33, "Merrill's Marauders: The truth About an Incredible Adventure", Harper's Magazine, Janyuary 1957.
"I was to learn later in life that we tend to meet any new situation by reorganizing; and a wonderful method it can be for creating the illusion of progress while producing confusion, inefficiency, and demoralization."
~ Generally attributed to Gaius Petronius Arbiter, but more likely paraphrased from Charles Ogburn, pp. 32-33, "Merrill's Marauders: The truth About an Incredible Adventure", Harper's Magazine, Janyuary 1957.
The Power of Myth
We must be willing to get rid of the life we planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us.
- Joseph Campbell
from Scrubs...
"Ok, here's the low down...
In three hours my shift ends, at which point I will be leaving you and meeting with my ex-wife for a celebratory 'Best Doctor in the City' date with is guaranteed to end with crrrazy hotel sex.
I'm thinking six-inch heels, a leather mask, fishnet stockings...
Who knows? She may even get dressed up!"
- Dr. Cox
Yeah, but what did he know?
"Go confidently in the direction of your dreams!
Live the life you've imagined."
~ Thoreau
Fractured Wisdom...
So...what's your story!
You can have either a great excuse or a great story.
- read in Glamour magazine (of all places), Sept 2008 issue
Dang!
He who is not contented with what he has, would not be contented with what he would like to have
~ Socrates
Yes, We Can!
"I won't insult your intelligence by suggesting that you really believe what you just said.”
-William F. Buckley, Jr.
-William F. Buckley, Jr.
Multitasking...
This comes from the 43 folders web site:
Multitasking is the art of distracting yourself from two things you’d rather not be doing by doing them simultaneously.
Guacamole
- Peel and remove the pit from a couple of ripe avocados.
- Mash well
- Hit with a few splashes of fresh lime juice.
- Add in a few shakes of Tabasco sauce, a little Kosher salt and a nice shake or two of chili powder.
- For good measure, I add a few TBS or so of chopped cilantro.
Drilling in Afghanistan
Excerpts from Thomas L. Friedman's essay, Drilling in Afghanistan...
You can read the entire essay here
"Sometimes in politics, particularly in campaigns, parties get wedded to slogans — so wedded that no one stops to think about what they’re saying, whether the reality has changed and what the implications would be if their bumper stickers really guided policy when they took office. Today, we have two examples of that: “Democrats for Afghanistan” and “Republicans for offshore drilling.”
Republicans have become so obsessed with the notion that we can drill our way out of our current energy crisis that re-opening our coastal waters to offshore drilling has become their answer for every energy question.
Anyone who looks at the growth of middle classes around the world and their rising demands for natural resources, plus the dangers of climate change driven by our addiction to fossil fuels, can see that clean renewable energy — wind, solar, nuclear and stuff we haven’t yet invented — is going to be the next great global industry. It has to be if we are going to grow in a stable way.
Therefore, the country that most owns the clean power industry is going to most own the next great technology breakthrough — the E.T. revolution, the energy technology revolution — and create millions of jobs and thousands of new businesses, just like the I.T. revolution did.
Republicans, by mindlessly repeating their offshore-drilling mantra, focusing on a 19th-century fuel, remind me of someone back in 1980 arguing that we should be putting all our money into making more and cheaper IBM Selectric typewriters — and forget about these things called the “PC” and “the Internet.” It is a strategy for making America a second-rate power and economy.
But Democrats have their analog. For many Democrats, Afghanistan was always the “good war,” as opposed to Iraq. I think Barack Obama needs to ask himself honestly: “Am I for sending more troops to Afghanistan because I really think we can win there, because I really think that that will bring an end to terrorism, or am I just doing it because to get elected in America, post-9/11, I have to be for winning some war?”
The truth is that Iraq, Afghanistan, Saudi Arabia, Lebanon and Pakistan are just different fronts in the same war. The core problem is that the Arab-Muslim world in too many places has been failing at modernity, and were it not for $120-a-barrel oil, that failure would be even more obvious. For far too long, this region has been dominated by authoritarian politics, massive youth unemployment, outdated education systems, a religious establishment resisting reform and now a death cult that glorifies young people committing suicide, often against other Muslims.
The humiliation this cocktail produces is the real source of terrorism. Saddam exploited it. Al Qaeda exploits it. Pakistan’s intelligence services exploit it. Hezbollah exploits it. The Taliban exploit it..."
Nothing to Wear...
From Reese Palley's great sailing manifesto, Unlikely Passages:
‘Shed cares, shed guilt, shed family and friends who bore you. Shed banks and accountants and doctors and taxi drivers and most of all shed the damned lawyers.
Shed the devious accents of land. Shed the salesmen who seek to lengthen your indenture. Shed aches and pains, shed embarrassment of flab and shed the flab itself. Then shed your clothes.
It is, after all, the only condition in which they will allow you back into Eden.’
An old song says it best...
Good-bye to things that bore me,
life is waiting for me.
I see a new horizon;
my life has only begun,
Beyond the blue horizon
lies a rising Sun.
- Beyond the Blue Horizon, 1930, Whiting, Harling, and Robin.
A man who knows what he wants
"Get me out of this hospital.
I want to go sailing!"
- Ted Kennedy, when told he had a brain tumor.
Wisdom regarding growing old...
Everything you think you are
when you are young,
you spend the rest of your life
learning that you never were
and never will be...
and
Everything we learn,
we learn too late...
when you are young,
you spend the rest of your life
learning that you never were
and never will be...
and
Everything we learn,
we learn too late...
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